Breaking Down Read online

  “And you want to do that now? I’m twenty years old, Pop.”

  “Never said timing was my forte,” he grumbles.

  I sigh and pull out my own seat. “Bentley is good for me,” I tell him.

  “I can see that.”

  “How?”

  “Your riding. It’s freer, looser.”

  “How do you know that?”

  “I was at your events.”

  “What? All of them?” I ask, shocked.

  He nods. “Of course.”

  “What about things back here?”

  He brushes that off. “Bria and Reed had that covered. You’ve grown, Jax, changed. You’re stronger now, and I know that’s because of her. I broke you, and she built you back up.”

  “You made me stronger too,” I say, in a quiet voice.

  “What’s that?” Pop asks.

  “I said, you made me stronger too. By doing what you did—”

  “You mean kicking you out,” he cuts in.

  I chuckle. “Yeah, that. By doing that, you forced me to go out and find out what else was out there. It made me realise just how good we have it here. I saw how other people operated, and I knew I didn’t want a part of that. I never would have done that if you hadn’t forced me. So you made me strong too.”

  There are tears in his eyes when I look into them. “I’m so sorry, Jax, for everything.”

  “Me too,” I say, standing and pulling him to his feet as well. Then, like I’m still four years old, I wrap my arms around his middle and cling to him. I’ve got to say, for an old dude, my pop’s still got it.

  I pull back. “You been working out, old man?” I ask.

  He laughs and clips me round the ears. “Gotta keep up with those grandkids of mine.”

  I chuckle and pat him on the back.

  “So you’re good with me and Bentley?” I ask.

  He nods. “She’s a good one.”

  “Even though she won’t marry me?”

  “Some would say, because of that.”

  “Hey!” I say, and we both laugh.

  “She’ll come around,” he assures me.

  “I hope so.”

  “You got a plan?”

  “Oh yeah,” I say, a smirk on my face. “I have a plan.”

  Chapter 34

  Bentley

  “You are too much,” Jax says as his lips travel up and down my neck. We’ve just gotten back to his house after the gala, and he’s well and truly feeling the effects of the free booze that was flowing.

  “Mmm,” I moan as I hold him tighter to me. His hand travels down my side, brushing the side of my breast, before going further, down my stomach, to my thigh. He pulls my dress up before sliding two fingers into me. I forwent panties in case I needed something to persuade Jax to stay. “Jax!” I scream.

  “Fuck yeah, darlin’, you’re so fucking wet for me.” I can’t do anything but nod as he glides in and out of me. “You like that?” he asks, and again I nod. “I need to hear you say it, darlin’.”

  “Y-yes,” I manage to gasp.

  “Good, then you’re going to love this,” he says, dropping to his knees and sucking my clit into his mouth. I come so fast it would be embarrassing, but I don’t care.

  “Holy shit,” I say as Jax sits back on his heels and looks up at me. “What was that for?”

  “Just showing my woman the love and affection she deserves,” he says as he gets up.

  “Well, feel free to do that at any time,” I says as I try to walk on wobbly legs.

  Jax stops and takes my face in his hands. “I’m going to give you the world, Bentley.”

  “Okay,” I say, both our smiles bright enough to light the whole town.

  He drags me to the couch and sits, pulling me on top of him so I’m straddling him.

  “I love you so much, darlin’. Thank you for giving me my family back.”

  “They were always here, Jax, but I think now they’re seeing things a bit clearer.”

  “What do you mean?” he asks.

  “Well, now you’re not just the baby of the family, now you have a home outside of them.”

  “You mean with you, right?”

  I smile. “Yes, dude, with me and Buttons.”

  “Can’t forget my girl,” he says as I begin to unbutton his shirt.

  “God forbid we do that.”

  “She’s very important.” He slides the straps of my dress down.

  “Can we stop talking about the cat now?” I ask as he takes a nipple in his mouth.

  “Mmmhmm.”

  “Good.” I reach beneath me and unbutton his pants, freeing his erection.

  “Fuck, darlin’,” he says as I gently pump him in my hand.

  “Yeah? You like this?” I ask. He nods. “How about this?” I lift my dress off and run his tip along my slit, coating him in my arousal. His head hits the back of the couch as he groans. “I take that as confirmation that feels good,” I say with a laugh. Jax nods. “How about this then?” I rise up a bit, position him at my entrance, and slide down on him. His eyes are shut tight, his jaw clenched. “Is everything okay?” I ask.

  He nods. “Never, for as long as I live, will I ever get used to how incredibly good it feels to be inside you with nothing between us.”

  “I love you so much, Jax,” I tell him. “Show me how much you love me.”

  Immediately he starts pounding into me. “Fuck,” I say after a bit, “I’m close.”

  At that he slows down his thrusts, leisurely drawing them out, but making sure when he pushes back in, to pull me down on him so he’s that much deeper. “What are you doing?” I ask.

  “Showing you how much I love you,” he tells me. “You blew me away when we first met; then when you finally let me in it was the greatest thing ever.” Tears I didn’t even realise I was crying run down my face. “I love you, Bentley, and even if you never agree to marry me, I will love you forever.”

  “I’ll love you forever,” I reply.

  “Good,” he says, taking my lips in what is probably the most sensual kiss of my life. Not long after, we’re both coming.

  “So you love me a lot, huh?” I ask afterwards, collapsed on his chest.

  “Yeah, darlin’,” he says, his hands running through my hair, “I love you a lot.”

  ***

  I guess when Jax said he was going to give me the whole world, I didn’t take it literally. But here I am, once more at an airport.

  “You know,” I say to Jax as he drags me inside, “I didn’t think you were literally going to give me the world.”

  “Huh? Oh, I’m not,” he says, leading me to the domestic terminal.

  “So just Australia then?” I ask.

  “Something like that.” He kisses me quickly and leads me towards security.

  “We don’t have to check in?”

  “Already done it,” he says, holding up two folded pieces of paper.

  “Where are we going?”

  “It’s a surprise.” He empties his pockets into one of the plastic bins.

  “You’re not going to tell me?”

  “Nope,” he says, and walks through the metal detector.

  Grudgingly, I follow. It’s only when I get to the gate that I see our destination.

  “We’re going to Perth?” I ask.

  “Yep.”

  “Jax,” I warn. “What have you done?”

  “Nothing you haven’t done for me,” he says, kissing my nose. I sigh and cross my arms. “Do you trust me?” he asks. It’s not lost on me that I asked the same thing of him just a few days ago.

  “If you tell me nothing bad is going to happen, I’m going to punch you in the nuts,” I say.

  He covers his crotch with his hands. “Fine, I won’t say it, but know that it’s true.”

  “Jax…,” I sigh.

  “Please, darlin’, just sit down. You know I would never do anything to hurt you, so just take a load off, okay?”

  “Fine,” I say, and sit. �
�But know that you’re not getting any sex for a month after this.”

  “Ha!” he says. “You say that now, but when you see what I have planned, I bet you’ll be tearing my clothes off.”

  “Whatever,” I say, knowing there’s no way in hell anything in Perth could ever elicit that reaction out of me.

  I was wrong. I was so very, very wrong. My parents were waiting for Jax and me at the airport. When they saw me, Mum burst into tears before they both ran to me and enveloped me in a bone-crushing hug. All the while, my cocky-arse boyfriend stood by and watched, a massive smile on his face.

  “Oh, Bentley,” Mum says as she pulls back so she can look at me. “You’re so beautiful. Just look at you.” She runs her hands through the ends of my hair, silver with purple roots this time, her eyes full of nothing but love.

  “What are you doing here?” I ask.

  “Jax called us about a month ago. He said he was going to propose and asked for our permission,” Dad says.

  “You asked my parents for their permission to marry me?” I ask Jax, who has a sheepish look on his face.

  “Would blessing sound better?” he asks.

  “I can’t believe you,” I say, shaking my head.

  “Look, before you go for my nuts—” he starts, but I rush at him, enveloping him in my own bone-crushing hug. “Oh,” he says, relaxing.

  “I can’t believe you did this,” I say into his neck.

  “Nothing more than what you did for me.”

  “Come on,” Dad says, “let’s go home and we can properly talk this out.”

  So it turns out my parents weren’t ashamed of what happened to me with Ethan, but rather, overwhelmed by the state of my injuries.

  “It was just so much,” Mum says as we sit in their living room. “First we had to come to terms with the attack happening, then who did it to you, and finally, what it would mean for your future.”

  I nod. I totally get where they’re coming from; it was a lot for me too.

  “We thought Ethan was a good guy,” Dad says. “Sure, he was a little possessive, but that’s not always a bad thing, especially with a girl as beautiful as yourself.”

  “We trusted him with you,” Mum says. “It was a shock to realise we were so very wrong.”

  “You didn’t think I was going through the same thing?” I ask.

  “Of course we did. We handled everything poorly, less than poorly,” she continues.

  “So we left,” Dad says. “And then we were ashamed we left, and convinced ourselves you never wanted to see or hear from us again. Lord knows I wouldn’t.”

  “I admit I was hurt,” I say. “You were supposed to support me at my lowest point. I was all alone and suffering horrific injuries, and you just left me.” They both hang their heads. “But if you had reached out, I would’ve answered. Eventually,” I say. At that, they lift their heads and smile.

  “Forgive us?” Mum asks.

  “Always,” I tell her, and go over for another three-way hug.

  The rest of the evening is spent catching up, and my parents getting to know Jax. He’s in his element, and I know I can’t possibly love him any more than I do now. When I met Jax, I thought I was good. I had a good life, a job I loved, a hobby I enjoyed, a small circle of friends, and a kick-arse house. I thought that was all I needed. It was certainly all I wanted. Then Jax came along. He showed me that while I was content with what I had, I wasn’t really living. I wasn’t whole. I thought I was done healing from what Ethan did to me, but now I know I was still broken. Jax put the final piece back into place. He was that final piece. And now I’m putting on our final piece.

  He’s fast asleep in bed next to me, one arm stretched out for me, the other resting on his stomach, his mouth wide open, light snores escaping from it. I may have made a big deal about not wanting to “belong” to him, but the truth is I did from the moment we met. I fought him, fought the feelings because I was terrified. It was a wall I’d built and I didn’t even know it, but Jax obliterated it. He broke it down and I’ve found my way home. To Jax.

  I slip his ring on my finger and lie down. His arms come around me, and I rest my hand on his chest, the frankly over-the-top diamond gleaming brightly.

  I wake to light kisses all over my face.

  “Mmm, morning,” I say, my hand moving from Jax’s chest to his hair.

  “It is, a very good morning,” he replies, pushing his erection into me. “You’re wearing your ring.” He takes my hand and brings it to his lips.

  “I am,” I say, smiling.

  “So does that mean you want to marry me?” he asks. I nod. “Tell me, darlin’.”

  “Yes, Jax, I want to marry you.”

  “Well, that’s too bad,” he says, pulling back so he can look me in the eyes.

  “What?” I ask, sitting up.

  “I’m rescinding my offer.”

  “Are you fucking with me?” I ask.

  “Of course I am,” he says, a massive smile on his face. “We’re getting married!” he shouts, before jumping all over me. “I knew you’d come to your senses sooner or later.”

  I shake my head. “You’re impossible.”

  He shrugs. “But I’m all yours.”

  I wrap my arms and legs around him, holding him tight to me. “Yes, you are. You put me back together, Jax. I didn’t even know I was still broken, but you fixed me.”

  He shakes his head. “I didn’t fix you. You did that, I just gave you a reason to heal.”

  “Thank you,” I tell him.

  “All part of the service,” he says with a wink. I shake my head, but raise my lips to his.

  I’ve been through a lot of shit in my life, stuff I’ve wished I could change, but now knowing that it all brought me to Jax, I wouldn’t change a thing. I have experienced some of the lowest lows a person can. I was broken, physically, mentally, emotionally. But all of that ensured I built walls only Jax was strong enough to break down.

  Epilogue

  Jax

  I wake to Bentley’s mouth wrapped around my dick.

  “Fuck, darlin’,” I mutter, before coming seconds later.

  “I thought you might like a little BJ for good luck,” she says, as she makes her way back up to me, her hair, back to its natural blonde, a mess.

  “I don’t need luck,” I say, and kiss her nose. “I have you, and you’re more than enough.”

  “Well, it can’t hurt.” She snuggles into my side, where she belongs.

  “Hey, I’m not complaining.” We both laugh.

  “Are you nervous?” she asks.

  “No.”

  “Really?”

  “It’s just one more day I get to do what I love. As long as I have the woman I love by my side, the rest is just icing.”

  And it’s true. Sure, being back at the Extreme Games, riding for my own team, an offshoot of Ryan Racing, is incredible, but it all pales in comparison to being with Bentley. She is everything, and more, that I ever wanted. This time last year I was begging Quinn to love me. How stupid does that sound? She was right not to give in to me. The person I was with her is nothing compared to the guy I am today because of Bentley. I was completely broken when I met her. Hell, I could hardly stand up straight. But she helped me, and pissed me off, and drove me crazy, but it all adds up to the guy I am now. A guy who broke away from his family and found his own feet. He’s someone who wasn’t afraid to go after a woman who had tried to keep the world at bay. He’s the one who broke down her walls.

  I didn’t think I could get much lower after my injury. Then I lost my spot at Ryan Racing, and I thought that was the end. I was done, broken beyond repair. But through everything, Bentley was there. Helping me. Healing me. It’s only once we’re truly broken we can begin to rebuild. With Bentley by my side, that’s what I’ve done. What we’ve done. And as I roll down the Big Air ramp, I know I am so much stronger than I was before. Because of her. Together we can break down anything, and I know she’ll always be there if I happ
en to fall.

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